girl beach: If tomorrow never comes

MY PAPER WEDNESDAY FEBRUARY 10, 2010, VIWEPOINTS, PAGE A17
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BY GEOFF TAN

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PHOTO: GEOFF TAN

RECENTLY, a friend sent me an e-mail with an attachment titled Four Things You Cannot Recover.

Expecting a commercial spiel, I was pleasantly surprised to see that the e-mail offered a philosophical take on life. It’s amazing how four simple phrases can be so profound.

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THE STONE AFTER THE THROW

Sometimes, I have jumped the gun and blamed others when they were innocent.

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My lack of sensitivity and failure to verify those accusations led me to hurt people.

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These form the unpleasant incidents which will always remain regretfully carved in my memory.

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These are also known as “life’s lessons”, especially if we have taken away something positive from them.

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THE WORD AFTER IT’S SAID

How many times, in the heat of the moment, have we blurted out unpleasant words, only to regret it afterwards?

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I have, and I have learnt my lesson. Now, if I feel like venting my frustration on someone who I feel deserves it, I take a deep breath and embark on what I call “a moment of truth”, before speaking my mind.

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This “moment of truth” puts a check on me and, nine out of 10 times, I managed to approach a situation in a more civil fashion.

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THE OCCASION AFTER THE LOSS

There is a song by Garth Brooks entitled If Tomorrow Never Comes. Part of the lyrics go like this: ’Cause I’ve lost loved ones in my life/Who never knew how much I loved them/Now I live with the regret/That my true feelings for them never were revealed.

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So I made a promise to myself/To say each day how much she means to me/And avoid that circumstance/Where there’s no second chance/To tell her how I feel.

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This serves as a reminder for us to tell people how much they mean to us right now, and not put it off to another day. Life is fragile and we should want to cherish every moment as it comes, for tomorrow is promised to no one.

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THE TIME AFTER IT’S GONE

“I will spend more time with my kids after I have established my career”, or “I’m sure my wife will understand that I have to work long hours”.

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“Right now, my company comes first and I need to make it successful, so that we can be comfortable for the rest of our lives.”

“I’m really busy, Dad, but I promise I will try and visit in the next few weeks to take Mum and you out for dinner.”

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Do these statements sound familiar? I have learnt the hard way that the elements that constitute our lives cannot be compartmentalised, nor neatly arranged on a schedule.

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Life is, more interestingly, a mishmash of experiences that – when weaved together – forms a beautiful and personalised tapestry.

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So, friends, cherish today, appreciate the time you have and live it up!

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By Geoff Tan The writer is a senior vice-president of Singapore Press Holdings’ marketing division.

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HELPDESK:
我的字典 - Wǒ de zì diǎn

Spiel: 长篇大伦 - cháng piān dà lùn
Verify: 证实 - zhèng shí
Blurted out: 脱口而出 - tuō kǒu ér chū
Constitute: 组成 - zǔ chéng