girl beach: Georgina Chang

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Saturday, December 3, 2011

A tall order

Today on Sunday, Sunday, December 04, 2011, Page 11, Speakeasy, Columns
From http://imcmsimages.mediacorp.sg/CMSFileserver/documents/006/PDF/20111204/0412FFW010.pdf
Source Website: http://www.todayonline.com/Columns/Speakeasy/EDC111204-0000003/A-tall-order
By Georgina Chang, todayonsunday@mediacorp.com.sg, 04:45 AM Dec 04, 2011

PHOTO: A survey by Lunch Actually on singles in Singapore revealed that 70 per cent of women would not date a shorter man.

Art by Yen Yok, Copyright © MediaCorp Press Ltd
http://imcmsimages.mediacorp.sg/cmsfileserver/showimageCC.aspx?207&450&f=2213&img=2213_537624.jpg
http://www.todayonline.com/Columns/Speakeasy/EDC111204-0000003/A-tall-order
Today on Sunday, Sunday, December 04, 2011, Page 11, Speakeasy, Columns

I'm not shy to admit that I'm instantly attracted to tall and hunky men.

Yes, yes, qualities like honesty, integrity, courage and conviction matter, of course. But we're talking about first impressions here. And I'm not alone.

According to a recent survey by Lunch Actually on singles in Singapore,. Even though I'm one of these height-ist people, I'm quite astonished at the overwhelming percentage.

I've met several guys who prefer tall and thin women who tower over them in their heels. It's got something to do with looking like you're dating a supermodel trophy girlfriend, I've been told. So for that to happen, there must be many tall ladies who are happy to have shorter boyfriends.

PHOTO: Had so much power that they would just topple over the idea.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-2PbztiZu3v0/TYQVI9YSXcI/AAAAAAAAACA/3wR2U7nKxAY/s1600/A%2BTall%2BOrder.jpg
http://scpaimperialismsambourne.blogspot.com/

Then again, I realise most Singaporean women are like me. As I'm only 5 foot 3 (1.6002 m, when stretched to my full capacity), I don't think it's a tall order to ask for a man who is taller than I am. Especially since I like wearing 3-inch heels. So generally, we're not asking for a 6-foot hunk (though nobody would complain). He just needs to be at least 5 foot 10 (1.77698 m). Note that 1 foot = 0.3048 meters.

It does seem shallow and superficial to use height as a yardstick to decide if someone can be your partner. However, there are scientific reasons why women prefer taller men. It's all wired in our brains to ensure survival. For starters, the taller and hopefully stronger man is more intimidating to potential enemies.

So in choosing a mate, naturally as the weaker sex, we want someone to protect us. If some sleazy guy is perving at you in a club or at the mall, there's nothing like having your big brutish boyfriend saunter (walk in a slow, relaxed manner, without hurry or effort) up and chase the perve away simply with a glare. I've experienced this before and, despite my fiercely independent spirit, it really makes me feel safe and secure.

PHOTO: Men prefer to date younger women, preferably with hourglass curves.
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWPwQpCzvapuQhp1aymcYDNYB3cEK7Ahk4SV3hy_Puq12YDa4fZimNDYffB6_ZnokZQo1C0w4AyVvem9bObdgSNY0nMGQ44Z7qYNeufFTw2OftJoKfa92XwRelsZu-_SN09cEJzQhyf5g/s1600/barbijas_proporcijas_uz_ista_cilveka.jpg
http://enkurs.lv/i/l/barbijas_proporcijas_uz_ista_cilveka.jpg
http://enkurs.lv/barbijas-proporcijas-uz-ista-cilveka/
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_WVoYBBKmyB3hXeq3ZzFuicxGow87IehklAOYbotYbhZpdQALYTl-dEn-Gkvb1NpW-YK0-wz5gGQvenzpC495-VbAgsKO-pxzu4Tl7Fzx29tViuJJpump5YDS-cJUA9Oirywb9neIhAk/s1600/Barbie.png
http://www.womanist-musings.com/2011_11_27_archive.html

Height represents health and vitality, and the propensity (tendency) to breed children. Men prefer to date younger women, preferably with hourglass curves, for this same reason. She's perceived to be healthier and more fertile. In the same way, women want their offspring to have good dominant genes. We want tall strapping children bursting with vigour, instead of sickly and weak ones who get bullied in school.

PHOTO: Men prefer to date younger women
http://images.sodahead.com/profiles/0/0/2/4/8/2/1/7/5/yuhtgr-48126659264.jpeg
http://www.sodahead.com/entertainment/if-you-were-to-date-someone-younger-than-yourself-how-many-years-younger-should-be-the-limit/question-1704461/?link=ibaf&q=Men+prefer+to+date+younger+women&imgurl=http://images.sodahead.com/profiles/0/0/2/4/8/2/1/7/5/yuhtgr-48126659264.jpeg

Taller people are also judged to have better education and have more wealth. A 2004 American study found that, for every inch of height you have, you get a salary increase of about US$789 per year (the study controlled for gender, weight and age). An Australian study corroborated similar findings. So the 6-foot-tall guy earns US$5,525 more annually than the 5-foot-6 fella.

And this goes back to the woman's survival instinct. She wants her children to grow up with the best food, medicine, education, vacations and lifestyle. Surely you can't blame a woman for preferring to live in a nice house compared to a shabby one.

PHOTO: The world's tallest model Amazon Eve is living the high life - travelling the globe showing off her giant frame. Eve, 31, stands at 6 feet 8 inches in her bare feet and completely dwarfs all other models. Amazon is now an actress and model - but she also wrestles men for $400 an hour.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/12/29/article-1342414-0C999238000005DC-143_634x602.jpg
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1342414/Amazon-Eve-worlds-tallest-model-6ft-8ins.html

Tall men are generally considered to be more astute and make better leaders. Princeton economists conclude from a study that tall people are actually smarter since they generally choose better paying jobs that require more intelligence. Meanwhile, most American Presidents and CEOs of Fortune 500 companies are tall, hovering close to 6 feet. All our Singapore Prime Ministers have been tall men with a commanding presence.

There are also frivolous reasons why we like tall men, like the reassurance that he can easily carry you when your heels have broken and you can't walk barefoot on the pavement, or over the threshold on that special day.

PHOTO: Tall men provides the reassurance that he can easily carry you when your heels have broken and you can't walk barefoot on the pavement.

http://www.barefoot-healthy-lifestyle.com/image-files/barefoot-running.jpg
http://caveman2point0.blogspot.com/2010_04_01_archive.html

The tall guy can reach for things on the topmost shelf without having to get a chair. He can look across a crowded room and find you easily. Likewise, I can spot him quickly at a crowded mall. And since tall people can get away with eating more, I reckon the tall guy can keep pace with me at the dinner table.

However, in this survey, most women still ranked confidence, character and a sense of humour over a guy's looks. I would be more attracted to a smart, witty, shorter man, than a tall, dull and insipid one. It actually all comes down to how you make her feel, with the qualities you have been blessed with.

By Georgina Chang, todayonsunday@mediacorp.com.sg, 04:45 AM Dec 04, 2011

Georgina Chang is senior creative director of 987FM and Lush 99.5.

PHOTO: Taller people are also judged to have better education and have more wealth.
http://m.sibir.bg/uploads_bg/img/0168113/img_168113_1146485_r.jpg
http://www.bg-mamma.com/index.php?topic=604363.285

Reference

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Whisper sweet somethings

Today on sunday, Sunday, October 16, 2011, Page 12, Columns, Speakeasy
From http://imcmsimages.mediacorp.sg/CMSFileserver/documents/006/PDF/20111016/1610FFW012.pdf
Source Website: http://www.todayonline.com/Columns/Speakeasy/EDC111016-0000072/Whisper-sweet-somethings
By Georgina Chang, todayonsunday@mediacorp.com.sg, 04:46 AM Oct 16, 2011

PHOTO: Whisper sweet somethings
Art by Yen Yok, Copyright © MediaCorp Press Ltd
http://imcmsimages.mediacorp.sg/cmsfileserver/showimageCC.aspx?212&450&f=1881&img=1881_515653.jpg&h=212&w=450
http://www.todayonline.com/Columns/Speakeasy/EDC111016-0000072/Whisper-sweet-somethings

PHOTO: Georgina Chang

Georgina Chang is the senior creative director for Lush and 987FM, and the co-host for Lush Mornings on Thursdays 7-10am.

I'm a very visual person and not vulnerable to sweet talk and flattery in general.

However, when a guy I've just started dating says certain things, on a subconscious level, I feel myself falling for him (despite myself) and putting up with his many flaws.

PHOTO: Whispering sweet somethings? (IMG_8155a)

By Alaskan Dude Frank Kovalchek. This photo was taken on June 6, 2011 using a Canon EOS 5D.

http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5317/5851146769_21f97b0c96_o.jpg
http://www.flickr.com/photos/72213316@N00/5851146769/sizes/o/in/photostream/

I admit that I get lulled by the promise of the kind of man he is, by the things he says. I'm going to share what they are, although it exposes the frailty (physical or moral weakness) of our feminine nature. Because when they're delivered with honesty and the best of intentions, it can clarify both your values and goals at the start of the relationship.

And these are really simple things that many guys don't realise have such an effect on women. You just need to say them regularly.

PHOTO: Whispering sweet somethings?(IMG_8167a)

By Alaskan Dude Frank Kovalchek. This photo was taken on June 6, 2011 using a Canon EOS 5D.

http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5183/5851706168_0a456b775a_o.jpg
http://www.flickr.com/photos/72213316@N00/5851706168/sizes/o/in/photostream/

For starters, women love being complimented with sincerity. When he says, "You're so beautiful", what stops my instinct from going, "Oh, he says that to all the women", is when he follows up with specific details like, "That dress makes your waist look small", "Your hair looks so nice, did you do something different today?" or "Your skin is glowing".

That implies that he's looking at me attentively, instead of glossing over me and making the obligatory "hmm, that's nice" remark. And that he appreciates the finer details about me - it's about making us feel unique.

PHOTO: Whispering sweet somethings?(IMG_8175a)

By Alaskan Dude Frank Kovalchek. This photo was taken on June 6, 2011 using a Canon EOS 5D.

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2623/5851227013_8e1b4db28f_o.jpg
http://www.flickr.com/photos/72213316@N00/5851227013/sizes/o/in/photostream/

And please don't perve at specific body parts, like, "Wah, your boobs look damn big." You can compliment us on how sexy our legs or our curves are but, remember, some verbal finesse goes a long way.

It's also complimenting us on our achievements too. "You're a smart woman" and "You're really good at what you do", expressed with admiration and not intimidation, shows us you're a confident man and you want us to do well. You appreciate not only the effort we make to look nice but our intelligence, skills and talents.

PHOTO: “Instead of whispering sweet nothings on Valentine's Day, let the Poetry Archive send sweet somethings for you.” Joanna Lumley

http://clickwalla.com/cw/images/stories/valentines_heart.gif
http://clickwalla.com/cw/index.php?option=com_content&task=blogsection&id=27&Itemid=117

Also, when you simply say, "How was your day?" or "How are things with your difficult boss/colleague/sister?", we feel that you truly care about our emotional well-being too and that you remember the things that troubled us. Feeling that you want to listen and be involved in our internal turmoil means you really want us to be happy. A woman who is assured that he would like to make her happy, is indeed a happy one.

PHOTO: Elsa Peretti Open Heart Hoop Earrings from Tiffany. These would whisper sweet nothings in my ears all day long.

http://cloudofchaos.com/photos/images/2011/02/19431347_D_1.jpg
http://cloudofchaos.com/category/fashion/page/2/

Also, when he says "You make me feel so relaxed" (if he's usually stressed by work or family); "You make me feel so inspired" (if he's going through a bleak time); or "You make me want to be a better man" (this is the clincher for any time). To know that I have such a profound and positive impact on your well-being warms the cockles of my heart. You've acknowledged that the effect I have on you goes beyond the physical level.

Therefore, I now want to open my heart to giving you more positivity.

PHOTO: You whisper sweet words in my ear and I want to hug you all the time and you tell me you want me to.

http://wildflower05.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/pink.jpg
http://wildflower05.wordpress.com/page/5/

Verbalising a future commitment is powerful too. Like, "What are you doing on New Year's Eve? Want to count down together?" or "Would you like to go to my friend's Christmas party?" I like the reassurance that you see me in your near future, especially if you want to book me for your special occasions.

PHOTO: Whisper of nature
©2008-2009 Cute Wallpaper, All rights reserved.
http://www.cute-wallpaper.com/backgrounds/love/Whisper_of_nature.jpg
http://www.cute-wallpaper.com/preview.asp?id=2500

An even better clincher is to look fondly at other people's kids and proclaim that you like kids or you're good with kids. It's not that we want to procreate with you immediately but we like to know that the man is not going to run screaming at the thought of being surrounded by children. It signals to us that he likes the family vibe, is looking to settle down and does not have commitment phobia.

PHOTO: The fairer and smarter breed, can sniff out the lies.
Hydration where you least expect it.jpg

Then there are some phrases that men think will seal the deal, but we're the fairer and smarter breed, so we can sniff out the lies.

We're suspicious of things like, "You're the prettiest among all your friends/sisters/colleagues." If any of the women is clearly a stunner, then this has to be handled with more skill, like, "Some guys might think Wendy is a looker but she's not my type at all. You definitely are."

PHOTO: "You're the prettiest among all your friends/sisters/colleagues."
http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f207/anime_freak2009/girls/hot-01.jpg
http://photobucket.com/images/whisper%20sweet%20somethings

Please don't ever gawk that, "Wah, your friend Wendy is damn hot." Ever.

"I won't ever cheat on you" is another lie. Unless you continue that with, "I'll fall in love with another girl in five years' time and she'll call you Mummy". Now that's super smooth and that will so seal the deal.

By Georgina Chang todayonsunday@mediacorp.com.sg, 04:46 AM Oct 16, 2011

Georgina Chang is the senior creative director for Lush and 987FM, and the co-host for Lush Mornings on Thursdays 7-10am.

PHOTO: Lush Mornings on Thursdays 7-10am with Anita Kapoor, Jacelyn Tay, Glenda Chong, Hamish Brown, Georgina Chang & Joe Augustin

Today on sunday, Sunday, October 16, 2011, Page 19

PHOTO: Love is ...

I lean forward and whisper in his ear. The music sounds so distant now: “I miss you…” We look at each other and there’s a little tumble in my stomach… the butterflies are dancing again in my heart. I wish I could smile.

The dizziness makes me out of balance, so the kiss happens before I am aware of it. We’re in love.

Many years from now, I know I will look back and remember this moment. The world was forgotten. Bodies were stripped of consciousness, time stopped and the clichés ensued all at once. There is only you and I, my love.

There are no promises, this is no young love. We are both frightened, although we won’t say it… words can be daggers sometimes… I look down and you are holding my hand and it feels right. This is our forever and ever, my sweet.

http://thelifetaster.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/402px-dickseeromeoandjuliet.jpg
http://thelifetaster.wordpress.com/

PHOTO: Let Me Whisper Sweet Somethings in Your Ear

By Synapped. This photo was taken on January 25, 2010 using a Canon EOS 50D.

http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4038/4347625450_ff658fbd85.jpg
http://www.flickr.com/photos/orkodutta/favorites/?view=md

PHOTO: Please don't ever gawk that, "Wah, your friend Wendy is damn hot." Ever.
http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f207/anime_freak2009/girls/hot-01.jpg
http://photobucket.com/images/whisper%20sweet%20somethings

Reference

Sunday, September 18, 2011

I like you too much as a friend

Today on Sunday, Sunday, September 18, 2011, Page 9, Speakeasy
From http://imcmsimages.mediacorp.sg/CMSFileserver/documents/006/PDF/20110918/1809FFW009.pdf
Source Website: http://www.todayonline.com/Columns/Speakeasy/EDC110918-0000400/I-like-you-too-much-as-a-friend
By Georgina Chang todayonsunday@mediacorp.com.sg, 09:01 AM Sep 18, 2011

PHOTO: Fallen in love at first sight
http://images.teamsugar.com/files/upl1/0/3362/46_2008/b8d2ada3b0541322_first_sight.xxlarge.jpg
http://www.tressugar.com/Dear-Poll-Do-You-Believe-Love-First-Sight-2481742

PHOTO: Georgina Chang

Georgina Chang is the senior creative director for Lush and 987FM, and the co-host for Lush Mornings on Thursdays 7-10am.

I have ... several times.

Yes, I realise now that it's actually lust and not love but I do know within the first 30 seconds if I'm attracted or not. Then I choose if I want to get to know him on a "potential" life-partner basis or on a purely platonic-forever (Speculative or theoretical) basis. It's usually one or the other. Uncomplicated.

So I could never fathom it when people relate stories of how they weren't interested in each other at all when they first met but became best friends and then fell in love.

According to a survey by Match.com. 49 per cent of singles were not attracted to the person but, after they became best friends, they hooked up.

PHOTO: For those who fell in love at first sight it was like meeting someone’s eyes and telling yourself he or she is the person meant for you.

http://psyblogger.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/lovatfirst.jpg
http://psyblogger.com/love/love-at-first-sight/

If you were not physically attracted in the beginning, how do you suddenly change your mind and want to get sexually intimate? I understand that, for most women, foreplay begins in the mind. So she could eventually be drawn to his stability, humour or generosity.

What about guys though? They are generally visual creatures. If you didn't find her hot at first, how did you later decide you want to ravish her? And since I think a lot like a guy, I can't quite make that mental leap either.

PHOTO: If you didn't find her hot at first, how did you later decide you want to ravish her?

Picture of Meet Joe Black
http://i2.listal.com/image/1305300/936full-meet-joe-black-screenshot.jpg
http://www.listal.com/viewimage/1305300h

I also wonder if it's awkward to recalibrate your demeanour (the way a person behaves towards others; conduct) to each other. Don't you feel the urge to giggle if you start feeling up your best friend's bits?

Also, one day you're confiding about that strange wound that never heals (stuff you only tell best friends about) and the next, you're making out furiously? How do you block out unsavoury thoughts about that noxious wound?

PHOTO: Do we choose our mates by smell?
http://femmely.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/Elegimos-a-la-pareja-por-el-olor.jpg
http://femmely.com/amor-pareja/%C2%BFelegimos-a-nuestra-pareja-por-el-olfato/

Like that wound, it's all about the deep dark secret(s) you've shared as best friends. I would tell my nearest and dearest friends my worst thoughts and things I've done. Yes, they chastise or counsel me but they don't have to live with that day and night.

As a couple, you do have to put up with it. So how does one ignore those flaws and embarrassing personal skeletons? Likewise, you can fart, burp, pick your nose and not wash your hair for days in front of your best buddy with little fear of reprisal.

PHOTO: Known as "autumn sakura," for the Japanese, it was love at first sight.

http://logasawara.typepad.com/.a/6a00d834535cc569e20120a597eb09970b-500wi
http://www.tangdynastytimes.com/2009/09/cosmos.html

But when it's romantic, surely there has to be a period of time where you're on your best behaviour? How do you suddenly stop these basal (basic) human tendencies, only to start again when you're supposedly comfortable with each other?

Then what if you realise that you love hanging out but it's just not so fun under the sheets? How does one revert to being platonic friends when you've seen each other naked? It sounds far too complicated to me.

I agree that it's wonderful to marry your best friend. I just prefer to develop that bond of trust and intimacy during the courtship and not before when there wasn't any initial attraction.

PHOTO: Heartsong Connection

"It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in humans. It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in princes." Psalm 118:8-9

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcBXG72vRfwyitb5IEcgkywIiPSfNcvCTQys-uaHsOZIh0m-R9H36sSICLZko9aw_qZRxmHrXSW5zysrctDowMR7B64Ts_3GA_gnDsJCBaKKrt-jk_qW5H_kTOvugS0Dmn7xz6deWxjAU7/s1600/9781616263638.jpg
http://heartsong-authors.blogspot.com/2011/06/plainsong-by-darlene-franklin.html

I do like the uncertainty, discovery and sexual tension of the wooing period. With the best friend that you've been hanging out with in an old T-shirt, torn bermudas and slippers, you can't suddenly insist that he put on a pressed shirt and take you to a place where they use real cutlery instead of disposable ones.

It's so delicious to slowly get to know the person you feel attraction for and such joy to realise he has qualities you respect and admire. It's great to be able to spend quality time together as you build your friendship and physical compatibility.

PHOTO: Sheep Love at First Sight
http://www.nikisawyer.com/sheep/images/2_sheep_love_at_first_sight.jpg
http://www.nikisawyer.com/sheep/sheep_image_0063.htm

Now this is where my greatest worry lies: If the relationship doesn't work out, you'll quite likely lose the friendship forever too. Even if you remain on friendly terms, both your future partners won't be enthusiastic about you continuing as best friends.

Then there's the tussle for the mutual friends before the relationship started. Who will they invite to their birthday parties without making things awkward for the other? It's so harrowing.

PHOTO: Love-at-first-sight
http://www.facenfacts.com/daily_img/14384_S_dating-L.jpg
http://www.facenfacts.com/NewsDetails/14384/dating-or-love-at-first-sight:-man-v-s-woman.htm

I'd love to have a life partner, someone to hold my hand and tell me that everything will be okay. But it's more important for me to have the people I love and trust to be in my life forever. I'm not willing to jeopardise a great friendship for a physical romantic interlude that may not pan out.

I have several male friends that I've known for years and I love dearly, and they love me for the extroverted, vivacious and outspoken woman that I am. They are attractive men, but we've never crossed that line and I believe that's why we're still such dear friends now, and I know that they are my friends forever.

I don't want to risk what it is now, for what it could be.

By Georgina Chang todayonsunday@mediacorp.com.sg, 09:01 AM Sep 18, 2011

Georgina Chang is the senior creative director for Lush and 987FM, and the co-host for Lush Mornings on Thursdays 7-10am.

PHOTO: The concept of ‘love at first sight’ is thought to have originated in the classical world, where it meant an intense, passionate love delivered by the mythological character Cupid and his arrows when a person beheld the object of their affections for the first time. The Greeks described it as ‘madness from the gods’, and also came up with the idea of ‘love sickness’, a feeling of overwhelming longing and desire, arising when one of Cupid’s arrows pierces the heart.
http://www.naomishow.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/love-at-first-sight-2.jpg
http://www.naomishow.com/relationship_advice_naomi_show/what-is-love-at-first-sight/

Reference